Posted on February 28, 2011 by admin

Once you have joined your daughter on her side of the bridge, listen with an open heart and with open eyes as if you are learning a new language…her language! You probably don’t feel like you speak her language anymore anyway, right? Repeat words that she shares with you, “So I heard you say.” “So you’re saying…” “I want to make sure I’m hearing you correctly, you want XX to…

Posted on January 12, 2011 by admin

1. Agree on specific times for doing homework and stick to it. Homework time is usually right after school or after school programs. Give your girl a little time to decompress with a check-in or snack and then dig in. 2. Make an agreement with your girl… and write it down. For example: “We do [...]

Posted on December 09, 2010 by admin

 In order to create change and shifts in our relationships we need to begin to look at the way we respond. If we keep on doing the same exact thing and we keep on getting the same negative results, then it’s time to take a deeper look into how we can change our response to [...]

Posted on December 06, 2010 by admin

Hey we’re learning too and each child is different. Admit your own confusion and mistakes. Apologize when appropriate. Show your daughter that just like them, you too are also “a work in progress.”  What a great way to model compassion, understanding and flexibility. Did you feel understood by adults when you were a child/teen? If [...]

Posted on November 23, 2010 by admin

By changing your reaction you can change your child’s reaction too. The wonderful thing about your own response is that you have the power to stop and change it. IT IS possible to keep cool even when your girl is losing it. Now is the time to remind yourself of your own cool down methods [...]

Posted on November 17, 2010 by admin

Praise shows that you noticed her efforts. It also promotes a feeling of competency. There is simple praise that most of us are aware of, good game, great job, you’re a great helper, etc. And then there is praise that goes a level deeper.  Praise that truly recognizes us for who we really are, in [...]

Posted on November 09, 2010 by admin

Begin to understand that your girl genuinely feels strongly about the challenges in her child/teen world. Although it might seem trivial to you (“It’s one bad hair day, you can’t always get what you want”), right now, in this stage of her life, it is all consuming. So how do we help and support her [...]

Posted on October 22, 2010 by admin

 Do something totally out of the ordinary with your girl. Looking back I can remember standing on those ridiculous lines when the latest craze doll or toy came out. One time I remember going in the middle of the night with my entire family. We were breaking all the rules. We shook the tree and [...]

Posted on October 18, 2010 by admin

They’re always watching – Want your daughter to be trustworthy, responsible, and compassionate? Make sure you’re modeling those values and behaviors in your own life.  Who better to learn from than you? Let your girl see you taking responsibility for your finances, commitments and taking care of your possessions and relationships. And if you make a [...]

Posted on October 08, 2010 by admin

 When we are truly listening to someone whether it is our daughter, coworker, partner or friend it is important to listen to understand what they are experiencing rather than listening based on our own personal agenda. Next time you listen try putting your personal agenda aside for a few minutes and really listen to understand [...]